aChiNg dUe tO oVeR-sEnsitiVe??

i dunno y is it like that.. everything that i pay for u u wanna pay mi back but everything that u pay for mi u dun wan mi to pay u back.. watever i pay for u first u oso wanna pay mi back.. why u sae this kind of money 要算好来.. my heart is aching.. i'm feeling so weird.. the feeling that i kept with mi for quite awhile le.. is i thinking too much or is it true.. perhaps u wun read my blog animore ba.. so watever i type here is to express my own feeling onli ba.. so no offence n no "bu shuang" or angry if u read tis k.. i really has that feeling.. i alwayz tell myself is i over-sensitive le.. it isn't mean anything.. but i realli feel it.. i realli feel that there is a 距离 between us.. chatting on fone n stuff isn't like last time.. when u tell mi 这种钱要算好来 my heart sink and it realli aches.. u sae u dun like the feeling of owe-ing ppl money n stuff.. but the problem u didn't owe me but worse of all is i owe u but u still wanna pay mi money.. everything i get for u u oso 算好来 but u nv let mi 算好来 so that i can pay u.. i tot we used to say this kind of money things is 算不完的 is never ending de so dun everything oso be calculative abt it.. so dun everything sae i pay u so u pay mi back.. i dunno y but i feel like u are drawing a wall or distance between us.. i tot everything can dun suan de.. i dun wan u to pay mi the money from the start u nv even owe mi.. but since u insist n if i sae dun wan we might end up quarreling again which i dun wan that to happen so i give in to that.. but i realli hope u can stop paying mi money when u dun haf to.. i oso wanna do my part for our relationship.. but it seems like i wanna do something for that oso cant..

dear i realli hope is i think too much le.. actually i realli dunno how to get everything back to usual back to normal back to previous times.. haiz.. can u let mi do my part.. actually i realise 你好久没有叫我 dear le.. 你已经好久没有对我说你爱我之类的话.. 有时候真的没有那种被肯定的感觉.. ever since we last quarrel or perhaps u ignore mi for a week.. everything change totally.. dun haf the feeling that my dear dear will msg mi to tell mi u miss mi or ask mi to jiayou n stuff de msg.. 我好久好久没有听见你叫我 dear dear le.. 没有 "dear" 没有 "muack" 没有 "i miss you" 没有 "我爱你".. but todae when u sae 谁叫你是我的女朋友.. my hearte melt.. 我的心有很甜很甜的感觉.. u finally sae something that assure mi in ur heart.. actually i oso dunno wat position i m in ur heart le.. i think will nv be in the top few ba.. i used to be the 2nd or 3rd priority but now perhaps haf dropped le ba.. actually 我好想听见你说你多爱我，你有多想我，还有告诉我我在你心中有多重要.. 可是自从那件事之后，我们的恋情改变了.. haiz.. actually u got tell mi before u will reduce ur care n concern for mi le coz u feel that is bcoz u care too much for mi n i take it for granted.. guess that is y i m feeling like this now ba.. but everything feel so weird n different.. i still care for u like last time but u seem to be colder to mi now ba.. cant we get back to the time where we are so lovely.. i realli miss those time.. 其实我有想过你会像以前那样爱我那样想念我吗？ 其实也是我自己造成的不能怨任何人，只能怪我自己.. haiz.. 你对我的爱还像以前那样深吗？ 我对你的爱还是很深很深.. dear.. 我真的真的很爱很爱你..

i cant rmb when is the last time u say "I Love You".. but i dun dare to ask u do u still love mi as much as before.. i scare i will get disappointed with the answer n i scare u sae i onli think for myself or maybe u will sae "有关系吗？" haiz.. i think aft that incident i need a re-assurance from u but i dun dare to ask for that.. i cannot onli think abt myself.. mayb this doesn't realli matters at all but 我的心就是无法平静下来，感觉好不踏实.. haiz.. dun think so much le la.. there is nothing to think abt.. when time is RIGHT everything will be RIGHT then.. let natural take its course.. tis kind of things u will onli sae when it comes out from the bottom of ur heart.. if i ask u for it.. then it doesnt mean much... i will wait de.. wait till 1 day u will call mi n tell mi "dear dear wo hao xiang ni" although i dunno when will the day come but i will wait de.. wait for u de.. =) 我不会轻易放弃的，我会等到那天的到来 ^_^


How DEEP is your LOVE?