i just wanna get out of this..

why.. why it is so pain.. i realli dun wanna feel the pain again.. it is so pain.. is so painful.. why lies is everywhere.. i realli dun wanna feel the pain le.. i dun wanna love u.. i realli dun wan.. even i tell every1 i'm ok.. but i'm nv ok.. why i still love u.. why i still love u aft all tis.. why cant i hate u.. why cant i just forget everything n move on.. why do i still love u.. i dun wan.. it is so painful.. i try to convince myself everything is not the truth.. wat u sae is the truth wat others sae isn't.. but why again n again it is you who r lying to mi but i still choose to believe.. why i still believe.. i realli regretted falling for you.. i realli do... i cant move on.. i cant even get thru' my exam.. i already gave up my future le.. i dun haf future le.. u always sae i give up bcoz of myself not others who cause it.. but from the start i nv love u... i wun be struggling over here now to deal with my studies my emotions.. from the start u nv break up with mi.. i will be studying now happily to go home soon to see u.. u nv caused all tis.. is i give away my future.. is just i'm not strong n mature enough.. i gave it away.. i gave my future again due to my own foolishness n immature.. why m i so stupid n foolish.. 1 mistake.. regret for the rest of my life.. the regret will stay forever.. nothing will erase that away.. nothing can... 1 mistake i lost everything.. everything.. n i pay my future my studies which is a big big stake.. i'm just too silly le.. too stupid n foolish.. i suffered all those pain n all this pain for someone who treat mi this way.. haha.. other than stupid n fool wat else can i use to describe myself..

i realli duno how le.. i realli cannot deal with my emotions anymore.. no more.. i realli wanna collapse le.. i guess i learn nth during my time here except things abt lies n wat i get home is depression n crazy-ness.. i reali duno how le.. my head is very pain now.. i still need to go thru' this kind of days for how long.. for how long.. r u feeling more pain than mi.. i doubt so ba.. i dun wan feel this.. i dun wanna haf any memory of u.. it just hurt n pains.. i realli hope i can dun haf any feeling or any love for u.. i just hope n wan that to happen..